I get to watch my Grandchildren grow up right before my eyes. For some reason their struggles are vivid as I view from a distance. "Struggle" is the operative word. They, of course, come from the perspective of a blank slate. When they are born, all children have a "computer chip" in their brain that makes them unique. After that, each child is exposed to the learning experiences of life and develops into a totally special person. Pretty simple stuff.
My Dad understood the personal growth process. He did things that would just infuriate me (you know, piss me off). He didn't care! He was going to put me in situations that he knew would help me cope with life.
There were two things that were going to happen as I traversed my childhood. First, I wasn't going to sit on my ass. The rule was that "I had to get involved in something". In my case, my choice was sports and I ended up playing football, basketball and baseball. Football was never my favorite and I regularly indicated that I was considering quitting. My Dad's position was that I could quit football, but he wanted to know what was I going to do instead. Well I didn't know what I could substitute for football. Chasing girls and drinking cokes in the local drug store was not an option (we didn't have video games in those days). So I was caught. He knew I probably wouldn't find an alternative function. I played football.
Here is the gift my Dad gave me. Are you ready? This is really profound. Write it down. It is "once you start something, you have to finish it". That's it! I was not allowed to be a quitter. Never. It wasn't going to happen on his watch. Believe me, we had some royal "mind game" battles as I tried to wiggle out of commitments. He was just as stubborn as I was and he was bigger. So I never quit.
By not quitting the things I, I was forced to deal with all of life's issues. Yep, there were coaches I couldn't stand but I had to learn to work with them. There were times in sports when I didn't play "first string" and ended up sitting on the bench. I didn't like that and it made me determined to make the first team. Imagine that. It taught me to deal with other kids that were imperfect like me and supportive relationships were created. It taught me how to win. It taught me how to lose.
Where am I going with this? I want my Grandchildren to be successful. If I could pass on " the gift" I would keep them so busy that they wouldn't have time for any video games and useless diversions. If I could pass on the gift, I would encourage them to try things. If I could pass on the gift, they would understand that quitting was not an option. If I could pass on the gift they would know I loved them.
Love,
Dad